Bet

For the first time in days, I wasn't dreaming about death. It was simply about money.

Raipo brought me to this gambling place, so much like a stadium for Cock Fight. We were there for a supposed sideline. We take bets, and in every bet, we get a percent. The lewd trick is to tell they lost and so the money is entirely yours. Not just a percent of the wins.

Being new to the industry, I coudln't keep up with the collection. A man in a blue uniform who regularly takes the bet, took the money from me and organized it before remitting to the office. There goes all my hard earned cheat money.

Someone else then took it. This guy is pretty cute. He's tall, dark and pretty handsome. I wouldn't normaly like him. However, in that particular dream, i was so attracted to him.

Apparently, the bets I took won a little more than 20k. He offered half to me and telling he's taking the other half, as he needs it and I had cheated anyhow, so I didn't really deserve it. I told my mom, I'll go give Raipo at least 20-30% of the winnings. My mom, hesitated but couldn't refuse, since it was my money.

The guy was in a hurry. He said he had to run to his 2nd job, in K-Mart or somewhere. All the more endeared me to him. He's hardworking and he's very driven.

I have not met this man before. He's so different from those I've been with. So simple and so unique.

Who are you?

Anger and Distress

Dexter Lira was angry, in a VA event. What more, Christmas party.

I kinda knew why, but I wasn't telling. He vented it out on us, just because we were associated to the cause. But he didn't just scream at us. We were on our way to buy some Christmas party things. A van kind of car, so much like Carlo Francisco's was the only one available and Dexter drove it.

The way he drove was full of pure hatred and bitterness. We tumbled inside like little toys in a box on its way to charity. If it wasn't so painful and so threatening, it would have been funny.

Gigi Angeles, finally screamed Dex's name in such a commanding manner in her own rage and fear, not just for herself but for everybody. Like a Queen and her rebellious pawn, Dexter stopped in Gigi's call. He got off the car and ran. Everybody looked at me, as if it was my fault. It wasn't. I didn't do this. But their eyes showed they expected me to clean it up. There were only two choices, I have to clean up or I lose them all. In my head, I wouldn't want to lose any of them. So I ran after Dex.

I tried to talk to him. My slippers were torn. I bought a replacement pair, as he continued to vent. We walked around. Around what seemed like the UPLB campus.

Then the last thing I saw was Dexter and I, walking towards the dark. Enveloped, then embraced then swallowed by the dark.

More Death

Once again, death was the theme of my dream.

It was a game, where one by one people fall down. I didn't want to join, but my mere presence in the Mansion means I am already a contender. Batman was there, but he wasn't Bruce Wayne-y enough ... he wore transparent plastic teeth brace brackets for crying out loud. And when I asked him to deliver me from this evil, he said no, I have to compete and survive.

The Mansion, wasn't really a mansion. I've been there before, in another dream, where I was back in my old school as I've already graduated college. It was the Tall Camella School, where there was a Catholic Chapel in the nth floor and above that a conical shaped attic where I had to ask a student to NOT jump.

And remembering this, I had thought I would be safe there. So I ran. Along the way, I passed by the people I was with when I arrived, one after the other. They were all lying down, on a blood of pool.

I distinctly remember Icheb. He was so red with blood and his head seemed like to ooze more. He was supposed to be dead, but I thought he wasn't because his lips were twitching. I wanted to help and bring him up. But it was either I was forbidden or I was thinking of self-preservation. I ran. I ran up. I got to the Chapel, but I can't remember if I ever got to the attic and out. I knew there was still someone else alive in the grounds and that was the reason why I was still being chased.

And it scared the shit out of me. I had to force myself to wake up.

Death, Carnage and Changes

For the past few nights I've been having dreams of dead bodies. Too many of them. It's disturbing, really, cause I haven't been seeing movies or TV shows with dead guys in it. I haven't seen a single CSI episode for the past week.

Three nights ago, this was what I dreamt of.

I was supposed to be a new big sister in a house full of children. But on what was supposed to be my first day, was my last. When I arrived, the house was torn, destroyed and leaky. Blood and water merged on the floor. A was was waging, and the house was in the middle of it.

I found some of the children, shivering in the cold and of fear. They were so few. More lay wet and cold on the creaky floor. Some wouldn't let go of their dearest despite the . Some lay asleep beside those who have entered eternal sleep. A carnage of children in what's supposed to be a sanctuary for them.

Two nights ago, this was what I dreamt of:

I was following a cat. A pure white cat, just like Mara from Cats Compound. And as I followed, this cat turned into a grey little one with almost invisible white streaks like Chibi from Ankers. It lead me to an alley I have never seen before. There a man lies unmoving. The cat pushes nudges it with its paws, scratching it with its nails. The dead lay still, as his blood seep to the cat's fur.

Last night, this was what I dreamt of:

I saw a child dragging a mutilated body of a man who seems to be her father. As I came nearer I saw the body was torned in half. It wasn't a clean cut. It was torned like paper. And the child had the most deadpan face I've ever seen. She just kept on walking. She didn't mind anybody or listen to anything. She just kept on walking, dragging her dad's body to wherever she was going.

---oOo---

I feel weird seeing this horific images in my dreams. Yet I cannot seem to tell if it's a message or just dreams. For the first time. I can't tell.